Satire 101: 8 Funny Things I Noticed in Tesco Hypermarket

I usually go to Tesco Puchong once a week for shopping (one of the main items is diapers for my son) and whilst my wife is busy with her shopping list, I and my son usually stand aside with our shopping cart observing the other shoppers.

This is what I noticed:-

1. Some Tesco shopping carts have more kids in them than actual sundry items. Some even had to take another shopping cart for the sundry items.

2. Some shoppers take the opportunity to learn parallel parking, do emergency brakes and taking corners with their shopping cart full of sundry items (I do that too).

3. There are actually “road hoggers” along the shopping lane in Tesco. One can see that they have set aside the whole day for shopping and they can leisurely be strolling along the shopping lanes with a couple of shoppers following closely unable to overtake.

4. Some shoppers block the shopping lane with their shopping cart because they are undecided whether to take brand A or brand B, priced almost the same. Some even take out their calculators to calculate the price per litre/ml.

5. Some shoppers consider the trip to Tesco hypermarket as a family outing. You can actually see the entire family members (some even 3 generations) but if you noticed the shopping cart, the sundry items are less than 3 items (a couple of drinks, bread and a huge pillow which was on sale)

6. Some shoppers tend to be lost from their family members and actually needs to call on their hand-phone to locate them. Good thing I have yet to hear the lost & found family members announcements on the public speakers in Tesco.

7. The “Free Water” dispenser is like the “waterhole in the plains of Serengeti” – you can find the tired and weary shoppers there. This is also the reference point for the “lost & found” shoppers

8. Very rarely shoppers do their shopping with a shopping list (talk about impulse shopping!). A trip to buy something costing less than RM10 ends out to be shopping for monthly provisions costing more than RM200.

P.s. Before you shop, you need to “tour” the parking lot for parking – the headache before shopping